I have no clue what the hell I mean by that title! lol I just feel like I'm juggling a million things right now but really, in all actuality, I'm just managing to stay a float out of pure luck. I'm playing the role of the good mommy, the ok wife, the good daughter-in-law, and the good child oh yeah and great friend but I feel like I'm being pulled in a million directions when all I really want to do is run away with my hands over my ears yelling enough is enough. My Dad is having his other knee done in a week, my mom volunteered me to fill in for her at her church vacation bible school because of the surgery, my best friend gave me a guilt trip (well at least I felt that way) that she had no one else to take care of her daughter while she and her new hubby went on vacation, my mother-in-law and father-in-law need assistance so I'm making food to take there along with making it for my own family, and I still don't have a job and my daughter is going to need to be driven to school everyday starting very soon. I guess I'm bitching because none of this has left much time for myself. I feel myself slipping farther away then ever. Maybe I just need to get away but then I feel guilty doing that while Paul works!!! UGH! I know lots of people would kill to get to be a stay at home mom but this shit is not for me. I'm use to being able to say oh sorry I can't do that I have to work or hell they didn't even ask me to do things before because they knew I didn't have time. Now I'm free to do all this shit just because I don't have a real "job".
I feel really bad about feeling like this but I do!!! This is not helping with the weight issues! I need to get out of the house, can you tell?? HAHAHA I'm really not going nuts but I could if I hang here too much longer! I really am looking forward to trying the time at the gym. I think it might help, and it will definitely get me back around some people. I know that will help with my sanity issues.
2 comments:
Sometimes it pays to stay busy. At least then you are doing things that you signed up for, instead of things others are throwing at you. I guess now is as good a time as any to learn how to say no. I know it's hard for me to do, but it's so worth it in the end. You have to take care of you!
Thanks for your comment on my last post. It truly helps to know that others understand what I am trying to process every day. We should form a club or something!
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